Friday, 26 April 2013

Borrowed Words: I Hope This Only Happens In My Nightmares

I said,
"I'm lost without you

And I can't breathe without you
And I can't love without you
But I'm leaving you now"

You've been talking in your sleep
Things you never say to me...
You used to lie so close to me
Now there's nothing more than empty sheets
Between our love

Is it time to let you go?

If this was a movie, 
I'd say

"Turn around, come back, so I don't dream without you"
And I promise I will make you want to stay

But I don't know
How to be something you'd miss
I'm lost 'cause you're the only thing I know

It hurts to let you go.

I can already see you
Sleeping next to a new lover
Sharing your dreams with another
And all I can think is 
You won't find this
But I don't know how to be something you'd miss

If we fall apart
Please remember me at my best
Because the best part of me was always you

And you can keep my heart
It's more at home in your hand
Than in my chest

I don't know
How to be something you'd miss
Because I never thought we'd have a last kiss
Your name, forever the name on my lips

That last kiss I'll cherish
Until we meet again
I'll keep you in my memory;
I hope you think of me.

Saturday, 23 March 2013

The Bottom Line


*lights up*

"If you're so perfectly capable, why don't you do it all yourself? You don't even need me at all!"

    "I never said anything of the sort! You're jumping to conclusions based on your own rash assumptions."

"There you go again with your oh-so-logical, high and mighty brain. I was just trying to help you! Why are you getting all worked up about this?

"I didn't ask for your help! I left that there for a reason, and you shouldn't go around touching my stuff."

"And how was I supposed to know that? Can you not see anything from my perspective?"

"Well it's not like you're making it particularly easy for me! As if my life wasn't difficult enough as is."

"Oh, I make your life difficult? I'm so sick of this."

"Yeah, then why don't you go ahead and break up with me?"

"NO!"

(pause)

"No?"

"No... not like this. I refuse to lose us over something like this. I promised myself that I would always fight for us, because..."

"I love you."

"And I love you."

*blackout*

Thursday, 21 March 2013

Energy

Here's a story, once again
Of a girl too grand for the life she lived
She was a butterfly
A Southern Belle, as they said
But the mundane life in her speck of a town
Sanded her smile down to the grains of dust
That rested for centuries on dry ground
Exhausted by the familiarity
She spent her days staring past the safety
Of the bars of her gilded cage
She wasn't a dreamer
She believed in what she could touch
But she fell in love
With the patch of sky just beyond the horizon
No one seemed to understand 
Eighteen was no different than seventeen
Or sixteen for that fact
She wondered how long she would remain unchanged
If she could freeze time, an ironic notion, really
The only thing she would do 
Is run as far as she possibly could with outstretched arms
Simply to feel the grass underneath her feet
And the wind in her hair
She longs for the rain
To wipe away her tears and wash away the exhaustion
To work its magic on the Earth
So that she, too, could feel alive again 
Because anything that moves is better than nothing at all

Tuesday, 12 March 2013

Borrowed Words: Can We Keep the Ever After?

Take me back to the summer days...

This night's a perfect shade of dark blue
I don't know why I’m drawn to you
Could you be the other one so we’d equal two?
Light my heart up, baby, like a matchstick
And hit the gas quick
When our fingers interlock
[Sing] along to the start of forever
I'm ready to run, if you are

I don't want to be a bride
But you're the only reason that I wanna see the stars tonight
And only you keep me dreaming
We'll stay young and go dancing
We're a duchess and a prince
This feels like falling in love

Every time we kiss, I reach for the sky
laugh[ing] all night lying in the grass just talking about love
Trying to skip rocks on the ocean
Don't you dream impossible things?
I'm thinking two is better than one
But I don't want to be a bride

I just wanna be your girl, and spend this life with you
Don't count the miles; count the I-love-yous
Let them wonder how we got this far
Cause I don't need to wonder anymore
Can we keep the ever after, love?
I'll be your sunset
If you'll be my silhouette
I'm ready to run, if you are
If my heart was a compass, you'd be north

I don't want to be a bride
But forever is a long time
And I've realized, I wouldn't mind spending it by your side
You're the best thing I never knew I needed
Heaven is a place on Earth with you
They say that the world was built for two
Only worth living if somebody is loving you
If my heart was a house
You'd be home

The pen's in [our] hand[s] 
Ending unplanned 
In the end I want to be standing
At the beginning with you


(from: Breanne Düren, Jack's Mannequin, JRA, Bridgit Mendler, Paramore, Alyssa Reid, Vanessa Carlton, Adelaie, Diego Boneta, Death Cab for Cutie, Taylor Swift, Ed Sheeran, Cascada, Jessica Simpson, Boys Like Girls, Chrisina Perri, A Rocket to the Moon, Ne-Yo, Owl City, Lana Del Rey, He Is We, Natasha Bedingfield, Richard Marx & Donna Lewis)

Tuesday, 12 February 2013

Conversation Hearts

I sit beside a cup of hot tea 
Watching the clouds sift icing sugar
Over the city landscape turned Candyland-scape
With a bag of conversation hearts

The calendar turns a page
And suddenly everyone has a sweet tooth
I breathe in a tendril of spicy vanilla chai steam
And open the bag of conversation hearts

I pinch the corner and tug upwards
And watch the pastel coloured confectioneries
Spill eagerly over my tabletop
Sweet, giggling conversation hearts

I smile back at them, remembering
Sparkling eyes and knowing smiles
Sleepovers and fantasy worlds and us
All thanks to conversation hearts

The sweetest hearts I've ever known
Taught me that love comes in all colours
Equally sweet and sincere
Like conversation hearts

So this is for you, my angels
I wish only the best for you
And I hope together forever is true
Because I miss your conversation hearts

And of course my thoughts
Would not be complete without you
The mere mention of your name brings to life
A thousand conversation hearts

Like the draft outside my window
Sends snowflakes flurrying into the minty winter air
You have the the same effect on the
Heartbeats of conversation hearts

As they flutter back down to reality
I line them up in chronological order
Your words diffuse through my chest
And bond like the text on conversation hearts

My fingertips graze the candied crossroads
And bring your words to life
I realize the journey is worth far more
Than individual conversation hearts

And as the afternoon fades to evening
I find the answers to all my questions
Mapped out on my tabletop
In the simplicity of conversation hearts

I push back my chair just in time to see
A pair of shooting stars streak through the sky
Leaving a trail of pixels behind
A dotted line of conversation hearts

Monday, 31 December 2012

Letters


1.  Go outside; be outstanding.
     I don't even know how we did it. What exactly was it that made both of us know from the second we met that we would share such a degree of friendship? None of this would ever have happened under any other circumstances, but somewhere, somehow, we managed to strike a bond- one of unprejudiced, unwavering, undying trust. It is this trust that means the world to me. Thank you, thank you, thank you, for being there for me when I needed it most.
     Distance has always been an interesting concept for us, one that really doesn't matter. I think it's because we both know that no matter how far apart we are and despite our differences, there's something about each other that will always spark the understanding. So wherever in the world you are, whatever life you're striving for, I hope you have found success beyond the standards of society; that you have made yourself a niche where you are truly comfortable without having succumbed to "normalcy". I hope that, despite the image of that tough exterior you paint on yourself, you let people know you far deeper, where your heart truly lies.
      P.S. As cliché as this may sound, I hope you find the girl of your dreams; you deserve her, and believe me when I say this: she deserves you.


2. I hope you feel satisfied.
    You are brilliant. You are intense, driven, and goal-oriented. But I hope that every once in a while, you step back to look at the life you've created for yourself. And I hope it brings a smile to your face. I love that smile. I hope that in these quiet, reflective moments, you come to realize what a masterpiece this is. Be proud of yourself- of the mountains you've climbed and the distance you've come. You've changed so much, yet not at all. You told me once that after such a long time, you felt alive. I think that's incredible and exhilarating, to know that you can push yourself to  your breaking point, but come back stronger than ever. It's the type of strength that everyone dreams to have , but for most, it remains that way - a dream. But you bring it to reality - not only for yourself, but for me as well. Thank you for making me believe in myself when it seemed like the last thing I could do. Thanks for the tough love; for telling me to keep fighting, and giving me the courage to do so. I honestly don't know where I'd be without it. You have fought so hard to get to where you are today. I hope you find your work rewarding, because I know, in the end, that's what means the most to you.
    P.S. Start doing things for no other reason than passion. Not everything you do has to serve a direct purpose.


3. Never stop chasing your dreams.
     Hell -or somewhere awfully close to it- is a place to which we've both been... But more importantly, it's a place from which we've both returned. If I haven't told you this already, I'll tell you now: I am so proud of you for being where you are now. Yes, you're dramatic, but I believe that you believe in yourself. However reckless, your confidence is what makes you who you are. I love how you balance being careful and carefree. We both know how much people judge you for your flaws, but I admire your ability to stand firmly for what you believe in and not let the opinions of others sway your mind. (Why should they? Your opinions don't need to rely on those of others.)
     You remind me of the Jazz Age: You are full of bright smiles and big dreams, and I really do hope you chase after them. You're one of the few people I know who truly believe in romance and know how to follow their heart. Let go of your insecurities; be proud of yourself, and keep challenging yourself. You've made it so far, you've accomplished so much, and I am so, so happy for you.
     P.S. You two are the best.


4. You're a jerk; the best one I've met.
    You really are a jerk. But your intelligence, sense of humour, and hilariously strange personality are unparalleled. I think what makes you so awesome is the fact that you've managed to step confidently out of whatever stereotype society had cut out for you. You turned out to be nearly the exact opposite of what I thought you would be. So the wisdom of clichés is right sometimes; never judge a book by its cover. I'm glad I didn't judge you based on what I heard about you. I would have been missing out on an awesome friend and some fantastic memories.
   I trust that you're having a fantastic time challenging yourself right now. I hope you get a lot out of it, because I know you're bound for greatness. I'm proud of you for really putting yourself out there lately and expanding your comfort zone. You seem a lot happier where you are, and that's awesome. I didn't think you'd settle in better than the rest of us combined, but then again, you never fail to surprise me. Keep pushing those limits. You rock.


5. Find strength in every day.
    You're probably one of the strongest individuals I've ever known, so writing that opening line really shocked me. You're independent and brave, yet you know when decisions are rash. Your advice is wise and soothing, no matter what the situation. One of the best things about you is that you remind me that beauty lies so much deeper than the skin. Your heart is probably one of the most generous ones I know. Even in the hardest of times, you never hesitate to help others, and this selflessness is what I admire most about you. Thank you for opening up to me. It takes a lot to lay your weaknesses in front of someone and ask them for help, knowing your heart is fully exposed. I'm touched that I have your trust; I value it greatly. And never forget this: I'm here for you.
      P.S. Play up your talents; you have so many of them.


6. You're fearless, as always.
     It's been way too long. I never thought I'd see you again (not that we see much of each other now). But I'm glad you're here. It's awesome that of all places to be, you chose to come here. I know how much you loved where you were; you told me yourself, so long ago you probably don't even remember. Maybe a little change is good. I hope the city's treating you well, and that it turns out to be all that you want it to be. Honestly, I never thought the big city scene suited you that well anyway.
      Nonetheless, thanks for sticking around. The company you keep is one of the best, or to me at least. You remind me what it is to imagine and to dream, but at the same time you keep me grounded. How do you do that? I don't think I'll ever figure it out. But that's fine by me. The bottom line is, I love talking to you and I appreciate that you're always there for me. Thanks for keeping it real.
      P.S. Open yourself up to people! Seriously, your personality is fantastic and it's about time you let people see that.


7. I owe you all my gratitude.
    Hey. It's been a while since we last talked. It'll probably be a while until we talk again, if we ever do. But if I can say one last thing to you, it's this: I don't regret you. I never did, and I never will. I'm sorry if I hurt you. We were perfect the way we were, but I'm glad it didn't work out. I didn't expect it to. But it certainly was not time gone to waste. I learned a lot in those short months, all because of you. You were the definition of that summer and of a transition zone, and I'm glad we were there to see each other through it. You helped me end one chapter of my life with happiness and fond memories, and I found myself looking forward to the next. In this subsequent chapter, you gave me the self-confidence to pursue my goals. You taught me to take risks, open up, and enjoy life by the day. In the end, you taught me to let go, and to forgive. For all this I cannot thank you enough.
    I hope you've had a fresh start, and I trust that you're a lot happier now than you were back then. You're a great person, and I know you'll find someone who appreciates you to the fullest.


8. You define the word awesome.
     I've never laughed as hard with anyone as I do with you. We were best friends from day one, and I'm so happy we've managed to keep it this way, even after all these years. Some things just never die. Our friendship needs no context or situation; it just happens, and that's the best way it can happen. I love our spontaneity. No one understands the awesomeness of randomness as much as we do. I can't explain it to anyone, but I don't even have to explain anything with you. I love the way we go with the flow and have the greatest adventures along the way. We make mistakes, but we laugh it off and they become memories. Things with you are just so much fun. Let's promise to visit each other often and never lose our childhood selves.


9. It's an interesting change for me.
    I'm really glad we got to renew our friendship. And I'm glad we're better friends than we were back then. I never thought we'd ever be like this; we were always just so polite and distant, like all we had to do was fulfill the duty of smiling sweetly to one another and that was the extent of our friendship. I'm glad that's changed.
    You probably have no idea, but I am so jealous of you sometimes. I don't think I've ever felt so jealous of anyone before; it shocked me. I don't think I would- or could, for that matter- ever be the type of person you are, but there's something about your proximity to perfection that... irks me. Please don't take it as a bad thing; it's merely a piece of honesty about something that piques my interest.
Despite what I felt was a rocky start, things turned out to be a lot better than I thought they would. In the end, it's comforting to have someone to talk to, who's been in the exact same situations and who's doing the exact same things. I like having you around. Talking to you is so easy, and I hope you feel the same way.


10. I hope you're still grinning like you did back then.
      You reminded me what true friendship felt like, after the definition had been lost on me over the course of many years. You opened up a door for me that I didn't even know existed. But it was incredible, and I loved it. What you and the others (but especially you) showed me in that one year, I didn't even know I needed so badly. That year was amazing. I'm not sure if I'd have wanted to stay if given the choice though. I'm glad things turned out the way it did. I'd love to go back though. Maybe I'll see you again.
     Thanks for catching up with me. We've covered such a huge time gap in so little time, but I've realized that this is probably one of the most amazing things in life, losing touch with someone but getting to know them again years later. It's inspiring to see that you've been through all the same ups and downs as everyone else, yet you've picked yourself up and you're shining brighter than ever. Keep smiling. Your smile is so encouraging and so infectious. Whatever it is you're doing, keep doing it. You're friendly and popular, yet down to earth and so much fun. I know you'll do so many great things in life and live each day to the fullest. You seem happy, and quite simply, that makes me happy.

Friday, 28 December 2012

Moonshine

Moonshine
A beautiful reflection on the lake
The distance between us will always be
From the earth to its faithful satellite
Untouchable ray of light

You offer me your hand
But I dance a lonely duet
You illuminate my heart
As you shine through my chest

Your delicate touch brushes my cheek
Fresh tears spring to my eyes
Wishing you were mine

My tears, they break apart your surface
But like the downpour of a hurricane
You embrace the rain
And as they touch your lips
They disappear

How I wish I could hold you
Gently cradle you in my hands
And keep you safe from your monsters
As you kept me safe from mine

We could dance forever
Get lost in this dream
And be a girl, insecure and flawed
Made perfect by the glow of nightfall
Moonshine