Reflection

I used to be so sure

Of everything;

Of my world and all its contents.

I used to wake up from refreshing sleep

And smile with self-satisfaction at the mirror.

I used to look deep into the eyes of my reflection,

Through a camera lens crystal clear

And see a world, so beautiful, so perfect.

I used to walk along a path, delicately paved,

Each stepping stone aligned just right,

The way I liked it.

That land was a wonderland,

A dreamscape, if you will.

But dreams don’t last forever,

As I’m sure you are aware.

And now, as I peel my eyelids apart

After restless nights,

The turmoil of my sleep

Having seemed to knock the lenses out of focus.

The angles are all wrong now.

The smooth roads crack relentlessly,

And I trip at every turn.

The soft lullabies of weeping willow branches

Turn into screams.

The light spring rains

Evolve into thunderstorms of tears.

The gently rolling clouds

Suddenly turn into clusters of smoke,

Black and gray and sickly yellow.

My world is filled with smoke and mirrors,

Screams and tears.

Where did this haze come from?

I have no idea.

But it chokes me.

And it chokes my reflection,

Suffocating its clarity and perfection.

I lost the one thing I thought I would never lose.

I lost sight of myself.

Now, I stare desperately at my reflection,

But my eyes are only as deep as the glass.